Finally, I believe, crossing my fingers, I've found the solution. Oddpost, a competitor to Hotmail in web-based email, is killing my spam. I've appealed for help before, and tried everything.
· Cloudmark's Spamnet was clever, allowing users to exchange information about particularly pernicious spammers, but it requires an Outlook plug-in. So it's no good if you're on the road, or accessing email from a handheld.
· All the geeks recommend server-based solutions such as SpamBayes, but most require the user to install the spam classifier on an email server, which is beyond most human beings with lives.
· Whitelist solutions, such as Mailblocks and Spamarrest work well. But Mailblocks only gives access to email through a browser, not through Outlook. Spamarrest didn't learn from the emails I sent, and would still require corresponds to jump through hoops in order to reply. Both systems, which require email senders to fill out a form before they can reach you, are extremely irritating. I found myself checking the held mail every day, which defeats the purpose. (Mailblocks picks up Yahoo and Hotmail email, though, which is cool.)
· And, now, Oddpost. The email service, a pay-for rival to Hotmail, boasts built-in Bayesian spam filtering, which detects spam by looking for phrases such as "penis extension" in the subject line. Until recently, email was only accessible through a browser. But Oddpost has recently provided POP access, which allows Outlook users to call down their email. Oddpost picks up email from your normal accounts, filters it, and delivers largely spam-free email to your inbox. So far, Oddpost hasn't held any email I wanted to receive. And the system should get better over time, as it learns the phrases that denote spam.
   My only remaining wish: Oddpost should combine Bayesian spam filtering with a whitelist. I want the system to let through anyone on my address book, and then to apply quite tough criteria to any random messages. If Oddpost does that, I'll die happy.