The French have the kissing ritual down pat. Left cheek, then right. If you're just good friends, that is. None of the American fumbling, which so often results in an embarrasingly outstretched hand and colliding noses. Of course, to make things really challenging for Anglo-Saxons, French kissing comes in as many varieties as the country has cheese. Paris: the straightforward one-two. Geneva: three, as in left-right-left. And southern France, where I've just spent a few days: left-right, pause, then left-right again. Globalization? Pah!